One of the most difficult parts of a long distance relationship or online relationship is handling the fact that you are not physically there with your partner. This lack of physical presence can make the whole relationship seem like an illusion. I am sure that almost every person in a long distance relationship has wondered at some point about whether the relationship was actually real or just wishful thinking. With this in mind, it is very important to create a presence for yourself in your partner’s life to provide a stable reality that you are a couple and that you are a part of one another. Listed below are some ideas and resources from Bob Narindra to help you achieve this.

Communication

1. Don’t fall out of touch, even for a short time
• Return all e-mails at the earliest opportunity.
• If you are going out of town or are otherwise going to be unable to respond, let your partner know as soon as possible so they don’t think something is wrong or start to have doubts.
2. Talk regularly through voice chat or via the telephone
• Your voice adds that touch of reality to the relationship and makes you more than just text on a screen
3. Video Chat if possible or at least send pictures regularly
• Can you imagine how differently you would feel if you could actually see your partner when you talk to them? You can bet that they would feel the same. Rather than having to imagine how you looked when you laughed or smiled, they could actually see it.
• It abolish any of those doubts you have about whether they will like the way you look.
4. Get to know as much as you can about each other
• Tell your partner about your day to day life, your friends, your relatives, your job etc. Make them feel like they are an integral part of your life. At the same time, find out as much as you can about them too.
5. Be there when needed
• One of the worst mistakes you can make in any relationship is to not be there for your partner when they need you. This is especially true of a long distance relationship as there are already inherent doubts and this will just reinforce those doubts.
• Seek your partner’s advice, listen to what they say and make them feel special and important to you.

Love

Love is the backbone of any relationship. As long as the other partner feels that you completely and unconditionally love them, those doubts will not have a chance to creep in. It is up to you to make sure they know exactly how you feel about them. Some ideas include:

1. Reinforce your affection with poems, stories and love letters
2. Send them care packages, postcards and gifts
3. Create a personalized love craft and send it to them

Presence

Make sure you have a presence in your partner’s life. Continually reinforce the fact that you are there, that this relationship is real and there is no way that you are going to let a little thing like distance get in your way. If you do the things listed above, you will create a good presence in your relationship. Just to make sure, I have listed below a few resources to help you.

• Voice and Video Chat
• Online Love Articles
• Romantic Ideas
• Love Crafts
• Love Dedications
• Electronic Postcards
• Love Poetry

Scared of losing her

Insecurity can be an evil presence in a relationship. I know you have a lot of emotion and time wrapped up in this relationship, but I would take this as a sign of how she handles emotional issues. Seriously, do you want to be with a person who won’t even talk about the issue, but just clams up and makes an instant judgment? When you’re in a long distance relationship, while you do get to know the other individual in a more personal manner, you don’t get to really see what day-to-day life would be like. With this situation you’re being given a HUGE glimpse. In any relationship, when there aren’t any trials or obstacles, of course everything is roses and lace. The real test of any relationship is how you face these obstacles or misunderstandings. Honestly, if I was in your situation, and this may sound extremely harsh, but I’d tell her if she’s unable to trust someone whom she’s said she loved, and she’s unable to compromise and listen to the reason for the misunderstanding, then she’s right, she should be with someone else. You have to learn to look at the big picture when situations like this arise. If she’s unable to come through it, then don’t look at it as your loss; it’s her. She’ll never find anyone who will make her completely happy with the way she handles things.

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The worst thing to handle in long distance relationship is the distance and the waiting. The thoughts going through your head are enough to drive anyone crazy. A person in long distance relationship can be worrying about anything and everything from looking okay to adjusting to a new city or country. So, how do you handle the little nagging thoughts in your head or the loneliness you feel at night? Jennifer Good will tell us her ideas.

1. A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

Surrounding yourself and your partner’s living space with pictures of each other is a great way to feel each other’s presence. Don’t just give each other the one or two token pictures. It isn’t enough to give each other a good reality of who the other person is. Constantly take pictures of yourselves in different settings. Every time you meet, take pictures of you both together. You’ll want to videotape yourself as well. It is a great way for your partner to see the live you whenever they want.

2. Leave Doubt Out, Plan Your Itinerary Together

A great way to bide the time while you’re waiting to see each other is to plan the itinerary for your next visit. Research together online the local city guides and relevant tourist attraction web sites. Not only will this help take away the question of what to do, it will help add even more excitement and anticipation towards your visit.

3. Get In Touch With Their Life

Take the time to get in touch with whom your love really is. Learning about her new home and her history is a great way to accomplish this. Take turns revealing something about your past or somewhere you like to go. Use local city guides to find pictures of your favorite places to go and show them to your online love.

4. Start a Countdown Ritual

Each time you are about to meet in person, starts some type of countdown ritual. It could be something as simple as telling each other how many days are left each day. Or, you could send a daily e-mail with how many days that are left. It is fun to look forward to something, and it helps assure you that it really is going to happen.

5. Surround Her with You

Sight is a wonderful sense, but it isn’t fulfilling enough on its own. Assault your girlfriend’s senses with other reminders of you. When you meet you won’t feel as foreign to each other if you’ve already smelled her cologne or perfume. She’ll know your likes and dislikes if you share your favorite music, movies and food. Your partner will know your mannerisms already if you’ve exchanged videotapes or make use of a web cam. When people in normal life are dating they have more than just a communication exchange to recall. Giving your partner a chance to recall other senses helps make you feel entirely more real to her.

Remember to make your time apart an opportunity to fulfill some personal goals and dreams that aren’t always as easy to do once you’re living with someone. Surround yourself with friends and family when you’re feeling down. And, when all else fails, know that true love really is worth to wait.

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