While you’re chatting, watch your Quarry’s reactions to what you are saying. Keep an eye out for involuntary facial expressions, head movements, body rotation, hand gestures, and even eye fluctuations. Like a top professional salesperson, learn how to interpret all these signals and plan your pitch accordingly. With the rare exception of those who have studied the highly complex art of deception, a person cannot not communicate how he or she feels. Your Quarry may not say in words how he or she is responding to what you are saying, but signals are clearly telling you nonetheless.
In my sales seminars, I teach a technique I call eyeball selling. Knowing what turns a customer on, what turns him off, and what leaves him neutral from moment to moment can make or break a sale. Likewise, knowing what turns your Quarry on, what turns him off, and what leaves her neutral from moment to moment can make or break your relationship. Say you have just been introduced to an exciting new stranger at a party. The two of you fall into conversation.
Watch Your Quarry’s Face Throughout the conversation, his or her expression will change.
Sometimes your Quarry’s face will suddenly take on a lively intensity. This might occur while you are discussing something which, to you, is mundane or boring. At other times, even when you are talking about something you consider a hot topic, his or her face falls flat. Watch for these telltale signs and tailor your conversation accordingly. When your Quarry’s face comes alive, ask for more information on that topic. Keep it going. You are on a roll.
When your Quarry’s face goes bland, that’s your cue to gently change the subject. Move on to another topic that will bring the light back into his or her eyes. Insensitive Hunters just go on and on with a topic that’s a clunker, and their prey soon wriggles out of the boring trap.
Watch Your Quarry’s Head Position When Quarries get bored with you, they turn their heads away. A noise from the kitchen, someone new walking into the room, hearing his or her name across the room—any interruption will cause them to look away from you. However, if your Quarry finds you or your conversation captivating, he or she won’t glance away.
An entire tray of glasses could go crashing to the floor by your feet, but your Quarry’s gaze would stay fixed on you. Be sensitive to the head twistings. When your Quarry starts rotating his or her head away from you, that’s another cue to spin a new conversational topic.
Explore Your Quarry’s Body Position When you are stuck in boring dialogue with someone, long before you vocalize your excuse to get away, your body begins making preparations. You take a step back, and your torso turns away. If you are chatting with a PLP who is stepping back or turning away, watch out. It could mean your budding relationship has already shriveled up in his or her mind. However, take precise aim and give it one more good shot. Do not keep babbling on. Arrest your monologue. Use your Quarry’s name.
Then ask a personal question which throws the focus back on him or her. This will recapture your Quarry’s attention and, if the relationship is not already crushed beyond resuscitation, it will nourish the seeds. Conversely, suppose your Quarry is giving you a full-faced, open, receptive body position. Top sales pros know this is the time to move in for the close. Do the same. Make your move. This is the time to make a date, get a phone number, or suggest that you two go somewhere else and continue the discussion over coffee or a drink.
Watch Your Quarry’s Hands Sometimes your Quarry’s lips can lie, but hands reveal all.
Occasionally glance at them while you are chatting to pick up some of the hidden thoughts he or she is harboring. Does he reach for a paper clip on a desk or a match on the mantlepiece while you’re talking? Does she run a finger around the edge of a cup? These motions express thoughtfulness or contemplation.
Your Quarry is thinking about what you just said. Take it as your cue to stop talking and let a breath of silence give cadence to your conversation. If you are uncomfortable with complete silence, at least slow down and maintain a pace that’s leisurely enough to let your Quarry have his or her own thoughts.
Palms up is an excellent sign. Hunters, when she has her palms facing you, it means she likes you. She is feeling vulnerable and probably welcomes more closeness. Palms up is the classic ”I submit” position. If appropriate, now is the time to gamble a first touch, perhaps on her open palm or on her arm.
Huntresses, pay special attention to pointed fingers. Does your Quarry shake a finger in the air while making a point? Think of a pointed finger as a mini erection which shows excitement over a particular detail. If he shakes a finger in the air while making a particular point, it means he feels strongly about it. Take it as your cue to express your wholehearted agreement with him.
Keep an Eye on Your Quarry’s Eyes If you see your Quarry’s eyes wandering, it’s not necessarily a rejection of you. It could just be that you’re on a boring topic. Try changing the subject. When you become a real expert on eye watching, you can gauge how well you’re doing by the size of your Quarry’s pupils. If the pupils start shrinking, an involuntary horn is blasting, “This is bor-ing!” If, however, his or her pupils start growing, an internal alarm is shouting, “I’m interested. Tell me more.”
